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-I'm doing a show at Johns-Hopkins on Saturday. If you want to come to the show and you aren't a student, email me at ryanconner@gmail.com so I can get you in.
-I really enjoyed writing the last two power rankings blogs. So, I'm now going to do one every other week. Coming up: MLB Names Power Rankings. 13 Original Colonies Power Rankings. After that... Extinct Ethnicity Power Rankings. The next one should be up by Tuesday.
-My new website should be up by now, but I'm being lazy. My bad. I finished it a week ago, then decided that I didn't like the look or the fonts (I did it all in wingdings). Give me another two weeks.
-I'm now sitting in my hotel room in Cleveland after doing a show at Baldwin-Wallace College. I'm staying at an airport hotel, which I just found out is code for “bad hotel.” They don't really put much into the appearance because people have to stay here if they want to be close to the airport. Most of the furniture looks like it belongs in an RV in the 70s. There's also an Archie Bunker chair, and coincidentally, the room smells like Carroll O'Conner died in it. It's a non-smoking room, but I don't think they're all that strict about it.
As a general rule, you know you're staying at a nice hotel, if the in-house shampoo is VO-5.
-When I was in school, people got made fun of if they wore Lee Jeans. Now they cost $200. What happened?
-I bought a DARE shirt a few months ago that read, “DARE: Danger,” or so I thought. When I wore it, someone said, “What the hell is a DARE Dancer?” I said, “No, it says Danger.” Then I looked at it again, and realized that I must be a selective reader. It definitely says “dancer.” I don't know what a DARE Dancer is, but I love the idea of a dance convincing people to not do drugs.
Although I do like my Dare Dancer shirt, I felt like I needed a new, more serious one. So, I went to Goodwill on Monday and found one that not only has a tie-dyed swirl on the front, but is also signed by the entire class. That's right, Sarah, Justin, Mike, Cassie, Kimberly and the whole gang signed it. This shirt is incredible. When I was paying, the cashier said to another employee, “Shoot, I been done got murried.”
-Words of wisdom from Bill Walton: “Robert Horry is not only a genius of the game of basketball, but also a genius of the human spirit.”
-I did a show at Sacred Heart University in Fairfield, Connecticut on Wednesday. It is a conservative Catholic school. And it was atrocious. I would write about it here, but I'm talking about it on-stage instead. Here is a highlight and incentive to come see a show:
They got offended by something I said, that you couldn't possibly construe to be offensive if you tried. So, I said something about Jesus not being able to hear us, or not being there. Then a girl said, without a shred of sarcasm, “Jesus is everywhere.”