FRIDAY NIGHT BLOGGING! CRAZY TIMES!
-The 13 Colonies blog was lackluster. I admit it. I thought of writing it almost a year ago and thought it was genius. Then, as I was writing it, the whole time I was thinking, "This...is...complete...shit." But after thinking about it for a year, I had to muscle on and finish it. It's now out in the open. It sucked.
-Neither of my feet currently work. I'm going to the podiatrist in the morning.
Problem with right foot: While walking, something moved, inside my foot skin, like a bone or tendon. Sharp pain has persisted for the past 4 days. After doing Internet foot problem diagnostics, it appears I have one of three things; a stress fracture; a bone spur; or tendinitis. Once again, this happened while walking. I spent two hours at the gym that day. Nothing happened there. But I can't seem to handle standard walking though.
Problem with left foot: Last night, after recording two new Crucial Element songs at Quincy Ledbetter's house, I stepped on an industrial staple, which went all the way into my heel. One inch staple. Inside my foot. How can both of these things happen to a person in one week? Let me re-phrase that. How can someone mess up both feet in one week without being in a motorcycle accident? And how can both injuries come from plain, old-fashioned, box-standard walking? Awww nuts.
-No more subtle promotion. I've been mentioning a rap group, Crucial Element, telling people to check them out. I just realized that people just thought I was trying to turn them onto a rap group. Why wouldn't you think that? It's actually a project, 6 years in the making, involving Quincy Ledbetter, my friend Mike, and myself. We're putting some episodes together as we speak. They should be done by the end of summer. In the meantime, you can check out some of our songs and headshots at http://www.myspace.com/crucialelement703
-I saw a vehicle whose front half was a motorcycle and whose back half was a Pontiac Fiero. I was speechless. Try to picture it. You can't do it.
-This is how I know technology has infringed upon face-to-face social interaction too much. A few days ago, I had a dream in which I was texting people. That's all that was happening. I was sitting on the couch, texting people. Then I went into that half-dream, half-awake state, where I was allowed to decide if I want the dream to continue. "Choose your own dream adventure, Ryan." I thought, let's see where this is going. Went back into the deep sleep. Then I went back into the half-awake state a while later. I was still texting people. That was the entire plot of the dream. Beginning: Text people. Middle: Text other people. End: Text some more people. WTF? LOLOLOLOL BRB. WTF. GODJKSHSBDB!?
-I saw a large group of 16-20-year-old girls on the subway last week. I really don't know how to describe this situation, but when I saw them, something clicked in my head and I realized, "Oh, that's why I didn't have many girlfriends in high school... or college." I can't describe what it was, but it was a Hemingway-caliber epiphany in my head. I visualized a big red X over all of them, like Elimidate. Then I pulled out my notebook and went through notes with a pen. I'm pretty sure the girls looked at me then and thought, "Oh, that's why I don't like some of the guys in high school."
-To anyone who has left me a voice mail in the past three years, are you mad at me about something? If not, why wouldn't you tell me how bad my voice mail greeting was? Erin Conroy was the only person to tell me how bad it was. I thought she was crazy, because I hadn't heard anything form anyone else. A few weeks ago, I heard it for the first time. Holy shit. It sounds like someone screaming, "LAAWWWWWHKKKKK D HHHHHHJJJJJJJJJ!" in the middle of a NASCAR race. Thanks everyone. Good looking out.
-My TV is on Spike TV, for some reason. I think UFC was on earlier or something. There's a show called Whacked Out Sports on. A woman went skydiving and fell into a fence. Then a screen popped up that said, "No Pain. No Gain." Really? Well, what was gained in that scene? A spinal fusion? I bet she's really reaping the rewards of that pain.
-There are ads on the PATH trains into NYC, containing a picture of middle school kids, with the message, "Talk to your kids about Crack and Cocaine. Their friends are." Umm... no, they're not. They definitely are not doing that. Even if they were, middle school kids don't have that kind of cash. On top of that, if your kid was into crack, or even if there was a possibility that he or she could go down that road, you could see it coming pretty easily. You don't go from the honor roll to the crack house. Only have the crack talk if necessary. And the cocaine message should be, "Talk to your kids about cocaine. Their friends are... provided that their friends are between 20 and 45-years-old, and have plenty of disposable income. Otherwise, don't worry about it. Try to make sure they don't get pregnant though."
-Neither of my feet currently work. I'm going to the podiatrist in the morning.
Problem with right foot: While walking, something moved, inside my foot skin, like a bone or tendon. Sharp pain has persisted for the past 4 days. After doing Internet foot problem diagnostics, it appears I have one of three things; a stress fracture; a bone spur; or tendinitis. Once again, this happened while walking. I spent two hours at the gym that day. Nothing happened there. But I can't seem to handle standard walking though.
Problem with left foot: Last night, after recording two new Crucial Element songs at Quincy Ledbetter's house, I stepped on an industrial staple, which went all the way into my heel. One inch staple. Inside my foot. How can both of these things happen to a person in one week? Let me re-phrase that. How can someone mess up both feet in one week without being in a motorcycle accident? And how can both injuries come from plain, old-fashioned, box-standard walking? Awww nuts.
-No more subtle promotion. I've been mentioning a rap group, Crucial Element, telling people to check them out. I just realized that people just thought I was trying to turn them onto a rap group. Why wouldn't you think that? It's actually a project, 6 years in the making, involving Quincy Ledbetter, my friend Mike, and myself. We're putting some episodes together as we speak. They should be done by the end of summer. In the meantime, you can check out some of our songs and headshots at http://www.myspace.com/crucialelement703
-I saw a vehicle whose front half was a motorcycle and whose back half was a Pontiac Fiero. I was speechless. Try to picture it. You can't do it.
-This is how I know technology has infringed upon face-to-face social interaction too much. A few days ago, I had a dream in which I was texting people. That's all that was happening. I was sitting on the couch, texting people. Then I went into that half-dream, half-awake state, where I was allowed to decide if I want the dream to continue. "Choose your own dream adventure, Ryan." I thought, let's see where this is going. Went back into the deep sleep. Then I went back into the half-awake state a while later. I was still texting people. That was the entire plot of the dream. Beginning: Text people. Middle: Text other people. End: Text some more people. WTF? LOLOLOLOL BRB. WTF. GODJKSHSBDB!?
-I saw a large group of 16-20-year-old girls on the subway last week. I really don't know how to describe this situation, but when I saw them, something clicked in my head and I realized, "Oh, that's why I didn't have many girlfriends in high school... or college." I can't describe what it was, but it was a Hemingway-caliber epiphany in my head. I visualized a big red X over all of them, like Elimidate. Then I pulled out my notebook and went through notes with a pen. I'm pretty sure the girls looked at me then and thought, "Oh, that's why I don't like some of the guys in high school."
-To anyone who has left me a voice mail in the past three years, are you mad at me about something? If not, why wouldn't you tell me how bad my voice mail greeting was? Erin Conroy was the only person to tell me how bad it was. I thought she was crazy, because I hadn't heard anything form anyone else. A few weeks ago, I heard it for the first time. Holy shit. It sounds like someone screaming, "LAAWWWWWHKKKKK D HHHHHHJJJJJJJJJ!" in the middle of a NASCAR race. Thanks everyone. Good looking out.
-My TV is on Spike TV, for some reason. I think UFC was on earlier or something. There's a show called Whacked Out Sports on. A woman went skydiving and fell into a fence. Then a screen popped up that said, "No Pain. No Gain." Really? Well, what was gained in that scene? A spinal fusion? I bet she's really reaping the rewards of that pain.
-There are ads on the PATH trains into NYC, containing a picture of middle school kids, with the message, "Talk to your kids about Crack and Cocaine. Their friends are." Umm... no, they're not. They definitely are not doing that. Even if they were, middle school kids don't have that kind of cash. On top of that, if your kid was into crack, or even if there was a possibility that he or she could go down that road, you could see it coming pretty easily. You don't go from the honor roll to the crack house. Only have the crack talk if necessary. And the cocaine message should be, "Talk to your kids about cocaine. Their friends are... provided that their friends are between 20 and 45-years-old, and have plenty of disposable income. Otherwise, don't worry about it. Try to make sure they don't get pregnant though."
posted by ryanconnercomedy at 12:42 AM
2 Comments:
it takes a big person to admit a blog was lackluster. a huge person. here. have some myspace kudos. use them to wipe away your tears.
You're welcome.
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