Crazy Guy

Last night, I went to a music show (concert) by roommate and Crucial Element compadre, Quincy Ledbetter, and another high school friend. The show was excellent. Our friend, Mike, who is our Crucial Element co-creator was there as well. We noticed a crazy guy inside before the show started. He looked like Bob Dylan (recent Bob Dylan with huge hair and mustache), which isn't a good look unless you are Bob Dylan. Otherwise, you just look like a crazy hobo. He wasn't traditional crazy. I think he was on something. What, I'm not sure. I don't think he was really drunk. And it wasn't pot or coke. Maybe a pain-killer or something.

Prior to the show, he yelled out, to no one in particular, "It's been about a week since I've heard a live drum kit!" The exclamation mark is there because he exclaimed it. If I was a little more of a dick, I would have yelled, "It's been roughly two months since I've had an avocado!"

Before the show started, Mike and I were outside talking. Then crazy guy approached. I transcribed the conversation as well as I could. This is abbreviated though, as the conversation actually lasted more than 10 minutes. I don't remember who said what out of Mike and I, so I'll just attribute everything to "Us."

Conversation begin:

Crazy Guy: Do either of you have a cigarette?

Us: No.

CG: Are you lovers?

Us: Of each other?

CG: Yes.

Us: No.

CG:Do you work in marketing?

Us: No, but good follow-up.

CG: Construction?

Us: Nope.

CG: I'm gonna get this.

Us: Get what?

CG: Questions.

Us: I can tell.

CG: Do you own a franchise?

Us: No franchises here.

...

CG: You've known each other for a long time?

Us: Yes.

CG: You fought over the same girl and there's tension between you two?

Us: No.

CG: You work together. No, exchange students. You swapped houses?

Us: No.

CG: You transferred to a new city and met.

Us: Kind of. Can we just tell you.

CG: [reluctantly] Yeah, go ahead. I don't know why I can't figure this out.

Us: We were college roommates.

CG: Ohhhhh. I should have... I can't believe I didn't get that.

...

CG: So, do you work in construction?

Us: Still don't work in construction.

CG: Even with this economy, things are picking up. [To me]You dress cool. [To Mike]You dress clean.

Us: Why, thank you.

CG: Ahhhh, I give up. What do you do?

Us: We write stuff together.

CG: Like what? Like screenplays?

Us: Mainly action-adventure movies.

CG: I can't believe I didn't guess that. Are you writing about James Joyce and Samuel Beckett?

Us: No. That's been done.

CG: Any other Irish writers?

Us: Action-adventure.

CG: That's great. You know, I write too.

Us: Cool. What do you write?

CG: I write notes.

Us: Notes?

CG: Yeah, notes.

Us: Like a to-do list? Like if you miss a phone call, you make a note to call the person back?

CG: More or less.

Us: Cool.

CG: I'm working on this other thing too.

Us: What's that?

CG: You know Seinfeld, the show?

Us: Yes.

CG: Well, I'm thinking we do a new on with new people and call it Seinfeld 2. It will be like Seinfeld, but for the new generation. Like Empire Strikes Back.

Us: Good idea, because you can't watch Seinfeld on TV or DVD these days.

CG: Exactly.

Us: Have you thought about casting yet?

CG: No. I haven't got that far yet.

Us: I'd get on that if I were you.

CG: Let me ask you a question. Do you think George Lucas stole Star Wars from the Star Wars comic book?

Me: I'm pretty sure the comic book was based on the movie.

CG: I don't think so, because I had the comic books as a kid. I think Lucas stole the idea.

Mike: Didn't he base Star Wars on Greek mythology?

CG: Let's put this to rest.

...

CG: Anyway, do you have a cigarette?

Us: Still don't.

CG: It was good talking to you guys.

Us: Yep.